Will sacrifice comfort to save the planet.
You have done the math and the math says the problem is people. You'd rewild the suburbs, compost the billionaires, and personally apologize to the trees. Your intentions are pure and your methods are a war crime with a garden. You are the only villain here who is technically correct about everything, which is why you're the most dangerous one at the party. You brought a reusable bag to the apocalypse.
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If it ruined your afternoon, that was the point.